• I recently sat down with Elisa Benson to discuss all things STIs on Cosmopolitan.com's Happy Hour Podcast.  We discuss common STO misconceptions and how you can discuss the topic with your partner. Check out the notes below and click on the image to listen to the full podcast!

  

  How to talk to your partner about getting tested:

  • Start with yourself. Tell them about your testing routine.
  • I get tested every year on my birthday.
  • I was tested 2 months ago. How about you?

  How to tell your partner about an STI:

  • Tell them before you have sex: I want to have sex with you. I have something to tell you first…
  • Don’t apologize. And don’t feel you need to explain to them how you contracted an STI.
  • If you’re inclined, feel free to share a few resources with them, as they may have questions you can’t (or don’t want to) answer on your own.
  • It can help to share the info with friends and other trusted support sources to practice opening up and...

Too much of a good thing may be wonderful, but when it comes to sex, taking a hiatus can be good for you relationship and sex life!

Read through some of the benefits of temporarily abstaining from sex to decide if now might be a good time to take a vacation from sex:

Benefit #1: A boost in libido

Science suggests that a sex fast can enhance sexual desire. When the brain and body lack specific stimuli, we tend to seek new sources of stimulation. The sexually-specific sensory deprivation experienced during a sex hiatus can help to fuel spontaneous sexual desire, which doesn’t tend to exist in abundance for many of us in long term relationships; we tend to experience desire after we’re aroused as opposed to spontaneously. Though you’re perfectly normal if you don’t experience spontaneous sexual desire, you can cultivate this experience via a nonpermanent break from sex.

Benefit #2: An Increase in Affection

As you take a break from your usual sexual routine,...

Kissing is more than a means to an end! If you want to take your kissing game to the next level, listen to this quickie episode and try out some of Jess’ favourite techniques tonight.

This podcast is brought to you by Desire Resorts. 

Partial Podcast Transcript Below:

Kissing is apparently not a natural act - meaning that it hasn’t existed since the beginning of human time. I know that it seems to us that it’s a totally innate behaviour, historians and evolutionary researches suggest that it actually emerged from maternal feeding routines. In fact, many cultures have prospered without locking lips which serves as a reminder that kissing is an erotic art as opposed to a reproductive imperative.

From a scientific perspective — even though it’s not innate — it’s likely that kissing may have been found to find its way into the mating game eventually. Not only does locking lips result in a flurry of feel-good hormones that promote...

Enhancing your sex life and reigniting the spark does not require a drastic overhaul of your lifestyle. Simple changes can produce immediate rewards, so pick one from this list of strategies and get started today. Once you’ve changed one habit or implemented one strategy for a week, add another until you’ve completed each item on the list.

Keep us posted on your progress. We love to hear from you!

1. Do NOT do kegels. Instead, see a Pelvic Floor Physiotherapist who can accurately assess the types of exercises that will benefit you specifically. Kegels are not a one-size-fits-all prescription and, in fact, are contraindicated in some cases. I’ve learned so much from my therapist; she assigned a series of exercises including squats, deep breathing and cat stretches and it has paid off both in and out of the bedroom.

To find a qualified therapist in your area, click here.

2. Ban electronic devices for the last two hours of the day. The light emitted by phones,...

According to a U.K. study, 45% of people keep friends they don't even like. But why do we do this? Do we aim to keep our friends close and our enemies closer? Jess dissected the latest research on "ambivalent friends" with Carolyn Mackenzie this morning on Global TV's The Morning Show. Check out her notes and video below.

What did the study find?

• According to 2000 Brits, they have an average of 16 friends and acquaintances — three of whom they don’t like/struggle to get along with.

What are our top complaints about these so-called friends?

• We don’t have anything in common.
• They’re too bossy/controlling.
• Our opinions differ significantly.
• How they behave when they drink.
• They’re too high maintenance.

Other complaints that made the top 20:

• The language they use.
• The way they treat their partner.
• They flirt with my partner.
• They don’t get along with my partner.

Why are we hanging out with people we don’t like?

• Oftentimes, it’s...

Orgasm: the subjective experience of intense pleasure and release at sexual climax, felt as a sequence of spasms in the genital area that can radiate to other parts of the body. But you don’t really need my Introduction to Human Sexuality textbook definition to know what I’m talking about. I mean we’ve all experienced this euphoric state…right? Not quite actually, in fact, it’s the disparity in orgasm frequency amongst women and men that led to the birth of the famous “orgasm gap”. Countless studies have shown that men report experiencing orgasm during sexual activity far more frequently than women. Early reports have even demonstrated that only 29% of women always experience an orgasm during sex, while 44% of heterosexual men say that their opposite sex partners always experience orgasm. This interesting difference in opinions has a lot to do with the goal-oriented nature men often enter into a sexual experience with.

So what are we the...

This morning on Global TV's The Morning Show, Jess discussed the connection between divorce and job stress with Jeff McArthur. Research suggests that those working in certain occupations are more likely to get divorced. Read on and watch the videos below to learn more!

Research suggests that certain occupations are associated with higher divorce rates by the age of 30:

1. Military supervisors

2. Logisticians

3. Auto mechanic

Previous research identifies divorce rates by occupation (regardless of age):

1. Dancers/choreographers (43% divorce rate)

2. Bartenders (38% divorce rate)

3. Massage Therapists (38% divorce rate)

Lowest divorce rates occur in the following professions:

1. Agricultural engineers (2% divorce rate)

2. Optometrists (4% divorce rate)

3. Transit police (5% divorce rate)

Why might this be?

• Work stress, hours and travel requirements may play a role, but you also have to consider the causal direction of these relationships; do the jobs contribute to divorce risk...

This week on Global TV's The Morning Show, Jess discusses the growing threat of revenge porn with Jeff McArthur. This is a growing problem that must be addressed. Check out Jess' notes and video below.

What is revenge porn?

It’s a form of sexual harassment. It’s a sex crime - it’s about power, control and violating consent.

How do you protect yourself?

The only way to really protect yourself is to not take or send nude pics or sex videos. Of course, in some cases (e.g. Mischa Barton), some partners will film you unknowingly.

What should happen if the relationship dissolves?

You should get rid of the photos/videos or at minimum resolve not to share them.

What can we do?

We can refuse to look at the images/videos. Do I want to see some of these celebrities naked? Sure. But I’m not going to violate their privacy?

What about the fact that Blac Chyna has posted nude pics on her own social media accounts?

We need to stop shaming the victims. If I had sex with you...

From foot fetishes and threesomes to squirting and vampire orgies, rule #34 of the internet, has yet to be disproven: If it exists, there is porn of it. No exceptions.

Despite the fact that there exists a genre of porn for everyone without exception, there is one variety that rises above the rest in popularity: MILF porn. The MILF, which stands for “Mom I’d Like to F*ck” is so sought after, that according to A Billion Wicked Thoughts, “mom” is the most popular search term on the world’s largest adult content site, Pornhub.com.

To help us better understand our erotic fascination with the mother-figure, I enlisted the expertise Dr. Justin Lehmiller, sex educator and author of the popular blog Sex and Psychology. According to Lehmiller, the popularization of MILF porn is not indicative of widespread desire for sex with our mothers.

“MILF is a misnomer. It is just a term that caught on, because it’s short and catchy. It’s not a new...